I'm sitting in class and the teacher is droning on about something or other, and someone raises their hand and asks, "is this on the test?" All heads jerk up. To our horror the answer is yes. Suddenly pencils fly and students frantically try to recall the last five minutes of class and keep up with the current information. When we realize what we're hearing has a direct relationship to us, we plug in. Subconsciously, we are always asking this question. When you are politely looking at a friends vacation pictures, listening to Grandpa's stories, or watching the news, you are listening for one component - does this relate to me in any way?
As you glance through the vacation pictures, you notice someone you knew in high school. Now your asking questions. "Is that Bob??!" and "How do you know each other?" Followed by long stories about you and Bob. This is not a fact that you will forget. It is a common element.
You are listening to the news and hear about a crime committed. It happened in the Walmart parking lot. You listen a little closer. It was broad daylight. You step into the room to see the t.v. This has a connection with you because everyone goes to Walmart in broad daylight. It could have happened to you. It could happen to you. Maybe you should take precautions. Had the crime happened in the red light district at 4:00 am, you would have kept doing what you were doing. Not that you don't care, but you know there is no chance of you being in that part of town at that time of night. We listen to find a common element.
The characters we root for in a movie are the ones we understand. Even if the main character is the criminal, if his motive is something we can relate to, we will be on the edge of our seat hoping he gets away. It is called character development. A movie that never explains why anyone makes the choices they make leaves the viewers thinking of all the ways they could have better spent the last two hours. Hours that could have been spent on themselves.
It is the reason why some people love history and others hate it. People who love history have realized the connection it has to who they are and where they live. The teachers who have made lasting impressions are the ones who have connected the cirriculum to who we are. The mentors we have looked up to are the ones who have made us feel loved or capable or important.
I am not criticizing people for being selfish, just pointing out a fact. An important fact that if acknowledged and capitalized upon will help you perform selfless acts and that will make your life truly important. Being able to find a common element with others, and helping them find a common element with you will make you the teacher, mentor, parent, spouse, and friend that influences people and makes a difference. That is what we want- that when we leave this earth it mattered that we were here. Once again, its all about me. Don't deny it embrace it. You can't change it, you may as well make it work for you.
